Brahman Brothers (Braham Shu & Brahman Kei) & Gorgeous Matsuno (c) vs Shuten Doji (KUDO, Yukio Sakaguchi, & Masa Takanashi)
KO-D Six Man Tag Team Championship
Saitama Super Arena, Saitama, Japan
Love the Brahmans. Love Sakaguchi. Enjoy KUDO. Think I enjoy Takanashi. Know I don’t enjoy looking at Gorgeous. Real mixed bag here. God, I hope to some day experience a Brahmans match live, because it looks CRAZY. Fun spot where the Brahmans put Gorgeous in a big dumpster type thing, a big trash cart on wheels, have him standing up in it with arms akimbo, and wheel him at Sakaguchi and Takanashi, lariating them both. Back in the ring, one of the Brahmans brings out a big burlap sack and dumps out a severed pig head into the ring. This is officially the weirdest match I’ve ever seen. He runs back outside with it, and Shuten Doji get a hold of it, with Takanashi holding it in front of one of the Brahman’s head while Sakaguchi kicks it. Sakaguchi and Gorgeous beat each other with the pig head on the outside on their way back to ringside. Brahmans get their typical “bowling ball sending big suitcase into opponent’s crotch” spot on Takanashi, and that phrase shouldn’t be so normal to me. One Brahman accidentally hits the other with a street sign and Takanashi tags out to KUDO, who kicks the shit out of everybody. Shuten Doji put both Brahmans into the corner, seated, and shove Gorgeous head-first into the first one’s crotch, put the suitcase behind him, and roll the bowling ball into it. KUDO and Takanashi hit some corner moves on Gorgeous, and even though the video skips a bit during the spot, I can hear Sakaguchi murder the poor old man with a kneelift for two. Sakaguchi locks in a sleeper and one of the Brahmans toss a bunch of flour in his face, and Gorgeous rolls him up for two. Gorgeous hits the 619 and goes for the world’s shittiest handspring back elbow, but Sakaguchi moves out of the way. Sakaguchi swings (kicks, I guess) for the fences with a PK, but Gorgeous likewise moves out of the way, and I’m thankful of it, because I didn’t want to see an old man die today. Gorgeous locks in a triangle armbar, and then flips Sakaguchi over into a cross armbreaker, and KUDO breaks it up with a sick top-rope kneedrop. Sakaguchi locks in a sleeper and gets the KO victory for the belts. Fun, zany stuff.